violent_

the weeks that have gone by just keep getting a little harder.

i hate arguing with people. i hate how many casualties there were today.

.. soldiers abused under the scrutiny of war understand that it's what's necessary.

what's the point?

there's no war to wager. not in this world. but they just keep..

dying.

.. what was it he said to me?

what was it i said to him?

.. "you're not my aotsuki."

But you are my Sumino.

...

no, that's not right. it was the other way around..

how could i say something like that?

labelling myself as "his takumi." to rub salt in the wound. childish chiding.

.. no.. no, that's also wrong.

there was once a time he had said that to me.

i know he did. i remember he did..

But you are my Sumino.

My Sumino.

.. no. no, stop.. my head..

my head hurts.. my stomach hurts..

hurts.. my throat burns..

.. i need to close my eyes..

i need to puke..

i don't want him to see me like this.

i just need to rest..

i just need more time...